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weblog :: the.rumpus :: archives Thursday, February 28, 2002 Sarah has a great blog: I think if I drove with someone sitting in the car next to me, I would say funny things. I would point out funny things about the street we were driving on, say. But maybe I wouldn’t. Sometimes, when people sit in the car next to me, I just get really distracted and then I get lost and I wonder if they can tell. So, Sarah has this great idea for blog composition: prompts. They work like this: a reader of the blog sends in an idea, phrase, or question to the blog writer, and they (the blog writer, not the reader) write about it. Why Candy is Good, by Billy. How much is too much? All the Places I've Been. What's Your Middle Name? Prompts, get it? I'm going to incorporate this starting now (even though I have, like, 3 whole readers). A prompt link appears at the top of this page. Click it. Make me write something. Drop a quarter in the personal-essay jukebox. :: 3:52 PM :: :: link to this post :: It's official. I am the designer for the 2002 Seattle International Film Festival program book. Got a sweeeet contract for the next 10 weeks. And just in time, too: my final unemployment benefits check comes next week. Yeeee-haw! :: 2:42 AM :: :: link to this post :: Wednesday, February 27, 2002 Well, chapter three of Coil isn't quite ready yet, so here are some cover designs instead.:: 2:03 PM :: :: link to this post :: Monday, February 25, 2002 Hello, faithful readers, I'm back. I see from my site tracker that you have all been loyally checking the page for new content everyday, only to be met with the same ol' crap. Sorry about that. I'm well into a severe case of Miss X Love-Haze and haven't had the time or interest to sit at a computer and compose my blog. The haze is still around, mind you, but Miss X herself has class tonight, so here I am, typing away.Today I had an "interview" with the Director of the Seattle International Film Festival about doing the layout and design for the SIFF program book. He had seen my work on the Talislanta book (and I've done a few small design jobs for SIFF in the past) and the interview consisted primarily of only one question: when can you start? It's nice to be wanted and all, but this job is notoriously horrible and frustrating (as my friend Conrad, last year's designer, has told me in detail) so I'm not all that excited about being offered the job. Still, it's the only job offer I've had in 6 months, so I'm gonna take it. I found out today that my buddy Jen is getting hitched. Her main-squeeze, Matt, is one lucky guy, and apparently, he knows it. Congrats to the both of 'em. Maybe their new puppy, Dixie, can be the ring-bearer at the wedding. I keep threatening to write a blog entry that is all deep and meaningful (or failing that, witty and erudite) but it just ain't coming to me. Instead, I'm gonna go finish up chapter three. Get yourself over to Peachy Keen or Sundry Morning or One Finger Shooting Zen if you want more meat in you blog. :: 7:33 PM :: :: link to this post :: Wednesday, February 20, 2002 Chapter Two of Coil is online now.:: 1:26 AM :: :: link to this post :: Listening to: VIP Lounge (electro/dub/world compilation) You may or may not be aware of this, but the funniest song to do a drag-show lip-synch to is "A Spoonful of Sugar" from Mary Poppins. I know this because I saw it with my very own eyes on Sunday night at the Odyssey in Vancouver, BC. Normally, a flamboyant drag-show is not where you will find your friendly, neighborhood blog-writer on a Sunday night, but I'm glad I went. Watching a grown man dressed as Julie Andrews, spooning Bacardi into the eager mouths of the audience and comically staggering across the stage made me laugh until I nearly cried. It probably helped that Jon, Alice, Andrea (the fabulous Miss X) and I were already pretty loaded from prolonged contact with Louis the Friendly Bartender at the local martini bar, but the show would have been hilarious regardless. Besides discovering the finest drag-show song ever, I learned a few other things during our 2-day Canadian Expedition: 1. Canadians call sneakers "runners." 2. A curling stone weighs 42 pounds and the person on the team who throws it is called a "skip." 3. Canadian bars stop serving alcohol at midnight on Sundays (socialist bastards). 4. Vancouver has more Starbucks per square foot than Seattle, and that's saying something. 5. The Virgin Megastore is so dense, even light cannot escape its surface. 6. Great dim sum is sometimes found in the least likely of places. 7. Louis the Friendly Bartender makes a mean coffee-flavored martini and can tell you how to get to a very funny drag-show on a Sunday night. 8. The sign for Jack Chow Insurance is much more exciting and mysterious from two blocks away than it is up close. Is it a fireworks factory? An electric art gallery? A candy store? An electric fireworks candy store? Nope. Insurance. 9. Hotel bathrobes are appropriate for any occasion. All-in-all, the trip was a success, thanks in large part to Alice's excellent hotel and bar selections. Also, 2 days spent in the company of Miss X is just what this ol' cowpoke had a hankerin' for, trip or no trip. :: 1:09 AM :: :: link to this post :: Saturday, February 16, 2002 Listening to: Tom Waits, The Black RiderChapter One of my fantasy/detective novel, Coil is online now. The link is over in the Words section. Let me know if that blue-text-on-black look is too hard to read. :: 5:48 PM :: :: link to this post :: [ Best. Picture. Ever. ] thanks to FARK, Rev, and of course, Wil, who beat me to this :: 3:07 AM :: :: link to this post :: Listening to: Tom Waits, Mule Variations and Frank's Wild Years Reading: The Nevermen I am in a Miss X haze. Or so Jen tells me, and I must admit it's true. Her real name, by the way, is Andrea. But we both agreed that "Miss X" is a pretty wicked codename, so I'm going to keep using it. (my old codename, "F. Murray Abraham" is not nearly cool enough anymore, so I changed it to Doctor Impossible) Anyway, the good Doctor has spent a thoroughly enjoyable week getting to know Miss X. "But," you cry, "can one ever truly know the secret center of the enigma known as Miss X? It seems unlikely... and dangerous!" Listen, they don't call me Doctor Impossible for nothin', kids. Someone's got to do it, and that someone is me! Hmmm. I've been working on Danger Patrol today, and I think the pulp-adventure voice is creeping into the ol' blog. Yeah... creeping... like the sinister tendrils of evil through the flaccid, black heart of this city -- the city of 1,000 heartaches and 10,000 bullets -- my city, my home. Er, so anyway, I'm working on the novel again too. I'm gonna post the first chapter sometime this weekend, just to tease ya. The other two finished chapters will follow along later. I'm hoping that if I can fool myself into thinking that the book has an audience (that's you, kids) then maybe I can finish the damn thing. We'll see. :: 2:49 AM :: :: link to this post :: Friday, February 15, 2002 I am such a snagging dork. Yesterday, I was supposed to have lunch with my pals Jen and Linda. That’s right, supposed to. Why didn’t I? Well, the short answer is contained in the first sentence of this post. The long answer is only slightly more forgiving of me, and involves Guy Pearce.Have I told you about my condition? Sometimes, usually after my sleep-cycle has become good and fucked up, I do things outside of my conscious awareness, having no memory of these acts later. I know, you’re imagining me knifing a hobo in a trainyard or ordering a BigMac with no clothes on, but it’s nothing like that. It’s just little things surrounding sleep, like drinking a glass of water next to the bed, or, as happened yesterday, turning off my alarm and going back to bed. Later, I have to piece together what happened. I know that water glass was full last night… or Why is the alarm turned off? I never heard it buzz… oh. It’s creepy. I’ve never been anesthetized, but I’ve heard people describe it, and it sounds like the same feeling. Except my brain is doing it without any help (no, no alcohol is involved). I loved Memento because it’s a great movie, but it resonated with me. I could identify with Guy Pearce’s character in those moments when he “came to” and had to reconstruct a segment of his life that he missed. In a way, this is an elaborate way of saying “it’s not my fault,” but in a strange way it is. I mean, I turned off the alarm yesterday and went back to sleep. But I didn’t want to. I wanted to get up and meet my friends for lunch. So, what did we learn from this, kids? One, I am sometimes only a passenger in my own body. And two, I need a much, much louder alarm clock. Possibly several, hidden around the room. :: 4:39 PM :: :: link to this post :: Thursday, February 14, 2002 A little earlier, I said something about the made-up corporate holiday that falls on this day, and a little something about love too, I think. As is often the case, Hal Hartley has already said it, in his excellent film Simple Men:Ned: I want adventure. I want romance. Bill: Ned, there is no such thing as adventure. There's no such thing as romance. There's only trouble and desire. Ned: Trouble and desire. Bill: That's right. And the funny thing is, when you desire something you immediately get into trouble. And when you're in trouble you don't desire anything at all. Ned: I see. Bill: It's impossible. Ned: It's ironic. Bill: It's a fucking tragedy is what it is, Ned. Hal takes a somewhat more bitter look than I do, but he's just such a great writer I felt compelled to share. But don't take Bill too seriously. Sometimes things work out for the best. Carry on. :: 1:34 PM :: :: link to this post :: Listening to: PJ Harvey, Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea Reading: Richard Russo, Straight Man ATTENTION Today is just another day. Do not purchase chocolates in heart-shaped boxes. Do not send flowers. Do not exchange cards printed with bad poetry. Hold the one you love close, and breathe in the scent of her skin. Kiss his neck, and say his name again and again. Remember your love when it was new. Let go of anger and blame. Today is just another day. Begin again. :: 2:16 AM :: :: link to this post :: Wednesday, February 13, 2002 A talk with Miss X has reminded me of other worthy Words of the Day:Represemble: Presumably, to represent a semblance of something else. See represents. (courtesy of The Fifth Wheel) Misunderestimate: Bushism. To underestimate incorrectly? (courtesy of the White House) Photage: An edited segment of moving-picture photography. See footage. (courtesy of my housemate, Chris) :: 1:42 AM :: :: link to this post :: Monday, February 11, 2002 Today's word:Amphiboly: An argument where the structure of a sentence allows two different interpretations. More logical fallacies... :: 9:06 PM :: :: link to this post :: Listening to: Cake, Fashion Nugget Reading: Raymond Carver, Where I'm Calling From (still and again) So, I saw Monster's Ball last night, accompanied by the lovely and delightful Miss X. The movie was very good... surprisingly good, actually. It's raw and difficult to watch in places, though. About halfway through I felt like I'd been beaten with a pipe. But it was worth it. Halle Berry's performance alone was worth it -- she's simply amazing. I haven't been a fan of hers before, but I certainly am now. Miss X was lovely and delightful (I may have mentioned that) and we had a fabulous conversation post-flick. A little later, Scotch was consumed. All-in-all, a truly excellent date. Sorry, faithful reader, about teasing you with a "Miss X" codename, but I didn't get around to asking her if she was okay with becoming a character in this public catalog of my life. So, until I hear otherwise, a codename it is. My codename is "F. Murray Abraham" in case you were wondering. A Humument showed up from Amazon the other day and it's the cat's meow. There's so much going on in this thing, I doubt I'll ever be finished with it. Kinda like The Dictionary of the Khazars in that way. And now I'm gonna have to start reading Borges again, too. I need a job just so I can have time to read on the bus. :: 3:50 PM :: :: link to this post :: Sunday, February 10, 2002 Overheard:Please Remember: Every day that you don't post a blog, the Baby Jesus cries. So get crackin', kids. Oh, and speaking of things overheard, this is pretty funny. :: 3:09 AM :: :: link to this post :: Saturday, February 09, 2002 Listening to: Aimee Mann, Bachelor Number TwoReading: Lois Lowry, Gathering Blue Christine, John, Susanna and I went to the Grand Illusion last night for the most recent installment in their Screwball Comedy series. The picture was The Awful Truth, a hilarious romp starring Cary Grant and Irene Dunne. The dog from the The Thin Man also makes an appearance, practically stealing the show during a very funny hide-and-seek, Abbot-and-Costello-style scene involving two identical-looking hats of different sizes. I love these kinds of movies (perfected by The Philadelphia Story) and I probably laughed more during this movie than I have in a long time (not since Monsters, Inc. I think). Anyway, after the movie, Christine and I talked a bit about the rather bizarre plots of these comedies from the thirties. In The Awful Truth, Cary Grant cheats on his wife, blames her for an affair that she didn't have, and divorces her. In The Philadelphia Story a woman leaves her alcoholic husband after he verbally abuses and hits her, only to go back to him because he's charming. This is all played for laughs, of course. And you don't feel bad laughing, either... it really is very funny, and the underlying plots (that would be dark and unsettling in another context) seem innocent and harmless. It makes me wonder what people thought of them when the movies were first released. Our modern culture is hyper-aware of inequalities, illnesses and abuse that went untreated and unspoken for a long time (alcoholism, spouse abuse, and gender roles to name a few) but did the 1937 audience even notice? Did anyone think something was amiss in The Awful Truth when only the wife's infidelity seemed to matter (the husband's being glossed over entirely, almost as if it was expected)? I really don't know. What do you think? :: 4:44 PM :: :: link to this post :: Wednesday, February 06, 2002 Interactive FictionNot familiar with the term? Maybe you remember the seminal text-adventure computer game, ZORK, in which you read descriptions of an imaginary environment and then typed in what you wanted your game-character to do. TAKE KEY, OPEN DOOR WITH KEY, WALK NORTH, etc. Now, ZORK was first and foremost a game. It was a massive landscape for you to explore, with quests and puzzles to be overcome and solved. It was lots of fun in the days before computer graphics. The text-adventure has not died, however. It has evolved into a new kind of storytelling called Interactive Fiction. IF is a kind of story that you get to participate in. You play a character in the story and you type in commands to move the story along. The story has a definite beginning, middle, and end, just like any other novel you read -- it's not a "choose your own adventure" stype of story, usually. It's like reading an ordinary novel in a lot of ways, in fact, except that in IF, if you suddenly become curious about what's under the table in the restaurant scene, you can check: LOOK UNDER TABLE. What's under there might be uninteresting, but it could be something special -- a little nugget the author left behind, just for you. This kind of flexibilty, combined with strong storytelling, is powerful stuff. In my opinion, no one does it better than Adam Cadre. His IF piece "Photopia" is a beautiful example of what can be done with the medium. Give it a read (it's a short story, and the 30 minutes it takes will be time well spent). After that, explore a little... there'a a lot more IF out there that's worth tracking down. :: 3:00 AM :: :: link to this post :: Tuesday, February 05, 2002 I recently corresponded with two artists that may work on my upcoming RPG, Danger Patrol. They're both very good, and I'm really looking forward to working with them.The first is Derek Kirk, the man behind Small Stores Online. Derek is a terrific writer and illustrator and I'm a big fan of his online comics, particularly the brilliant Same Difference. The second artist is Rick Cortes, a guy I found by sheer luck while haunting the Bruce Timm forums. Rick does incredible work, especially his Mike Mignola inspired Hellboy stuff and this excellent pic, which prompted me to contact him (doesn't it just scream Danger Patrol?). Anyway, both artists are psyched to work on DP, so as soon as Christine gets her type pics ready (for them to use as an art-bible), I'm gonna comission a piece from each of them. Wahoo. :: 3:19 AM :: :: link to this post :: First, I do NOT have a teardrop tattoo near my right eye, and I was NOT last seen driving a light-blue Ford away from the crime scene. That was somebody else. Second, I might get to be involved in the Delta Green computer game project in some tiny way. That would be cool. I'll let you know what happens. Third, I'm just not writing in the ol' blog as much I should. There are two reasons for this: 1) I'm not doing jack, thus I do not have jack to talk about and 2) I'm a lazy son of a bitch. Linda and Jen (and now Jon) are being all insightful, entertaining and prolific and frankly, they're making me look bad. This just won't do. :: 1:11 AM :: :: link to this post :: Sunday, February 03, 2002 If "Zen" were a person, I wouldn't ask it any questions, I'd just try to stare it down. I would be hoping to lose, though.I think I might start writing again. Little short things... stories, maybe. I dunno. I need to work on Danger Patrol, but I've got this urge. :: 2:32 AM :: :: link to this post :: Friday, February 01, 2002 Listening to: Massive AttackOverheard on the RPG.net forum: "Build a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and you keep him warm for the rest of his life." Thanks to Rev, I have found The Coolest Thing Ever, Tom Phillips' artwork/poem/novel, A Humument. Spend some time with this link, kids. It'll blow you away. I could be a book, explaining everything on margins. Now it's 1:30am, and I'm going grocery shopping. Later. :: 1:25 AM :: :: link to this post ::
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